jacobtheloofah: sarniel: tbskyen: tugamaggie: callmekitto: r…



jacobtheloofah:

sarniel:

tbskyen:

tugamaggie:

callmekitto:

raggedymind:

littledidxeknow:

todaylour:

andthroughthemosstheivycreeps:

impuretale:

beatrixspoke:

saaaaaasha:

hey guys

that is carved

 from MARBLE

THAT IS A ROCK

WAT

I have no idea how the artist manages to make it looks like not just cloth, but TRANSPARENT cloth. Amazing.

Hey Guys this is a sculpture of a Vestal Virgin, carved during the roman empire. its my favorite and is pretty fucking awesome. 

Blown away

I had the same reaction when I saw this motherfucker in the Louvre

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I walked around that hunk of orgasm rock for a good ten minutes trying to figure out HOW.

b-but that’s not how rocks work???!!?

FUCKING BERNINI THO

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FUCKING

BERNINI

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DID SOMEONE SAY BERNINI? HERE’S BERNINI SCULPTING A FAT CARDINAL.

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HERE’S A SELF-PORTRAIT. HE’S A DAMNED SOUL IN HELL, HE BURNED HIS HAND AND SCREAMED IN FRONT OF A MIRROR FOR REFERENCE BECAUSE FUCK EVERYTHING.

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OH AND LET’S TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT THOSE GRASPING ORGASM-HANDS

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SPEAKING OF ORGASMS HERE’S A NUN MASTURBATING. HE PUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER IN A FUCKING CHAPEL.

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DO YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE HE PUT IN A CHAPEL? THIS BITCHING PIECE OF MARBLE.

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IS THAT AN ANGEL POINTING A GOLDEN ARROW AT THE CROTCH OF A NUN? YOU BET YOUR FACE IT IS! IS SHE HAVING A MIND-BLOWING ANGEL-ORGASM?

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OF FUCKING COURSE SHE IS!

BERNINI!

Reblogging because batshit insane sculptors and horny statues are funny.

i will never understand why people take things like this for granted

like that shit was made of ROCK

IN LIKE AN AGE WHERE TOOLS FOR THIS WERE SO MUCH MORE PRIMITIVE

WE COULD DO THAT SHIT WITH LIKE A 3D PRINTER OR SOMETHING

THESE FUCKERS DID IT WITH THEIR GODDAMN HANDS AND BASIC TOOLS

RESPECT.

Ah, Tumblr.

Okay, so, what I’ve come to learn and love about Tumblr (and I do love it) is that it’s a living example of how oral tradition builds into legend and myth. It’s like what Yann Martel was talking about in Life of Pi: Tumblr’s users prefer the story with the tiger, even when it contains elements (a floating island that eats things?) that can’t be reconciled with everyday reality.

An item gets posted, and people respond to it emotionally. They add explanations, embellishments, personal stories. Over time, some versions get reblogged and amplified. Versions that tell a more satisfying story have a competitive edge, and by the time something has passed 100K notes the chance that it is factually accurate becomes really small.

I’ve been an editor on Wikipedia for many years. And with Wikipedia, there’s an explicit cultural norm that values accuracy and verifiability. Tumblr doesn’t have that, and it shows. And that’s fine; they’re different kinds of things.

This post is an interesting example of that. The original photo of the veiled marble statue is striking. Damn; how’d the sculptor do that? And then… Tumblr takes over.

Hey Guys this is a sculpture of a Vestal Virgin, carved during the roman empire. its my favorite and is pretty fucking awesome.

Yes, it’s a sculture of a vestal virgin, but no, it was not carved during the Roman Empire. Most people who recognize it probably do so because of the scene in the 2005 Pride and Prejudice when Elizabeth stares at it in wonder while touring Pemberley. But even in that movie, the statue is an anachronism. It’s Raffaelle Monti’s “A Veiled Vestal Virgin”, sculpted in 1847, decades after the Regency era when Austen’s stories were set, and a good 1300 years after the Roman Empire fell. That awesome simulation of veiled cloth over a marble figure became really popular during the Victorian era. Not that there aren’t things sort of like that in older statuary, but if you’re talking about this degree of the illusion, you’re talking about something from the mid-19th century or later.

SPEAKING OF ORGASMS HERE’S A NUN MASTURBATING. HE PUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER IN A FUCKING CHAPEL.

Um, no. The sculpture is at least a Bernini; it’s his Beata Ludovica Albertoni, a funerary monument he created for the Altieri Chapel in the church of San Francesco a Ripa in Rome in 1674. But the subject of the sculpture is 1) not a nun, but a lay tertiary; and 2) not masturbating (you can see both hands in the image above, and unless you’re counting touching her breast as masturbation she’s not) but dying. And yes, Bernini is interpreting a religious ecstasy as part of her death throes, and it really does look a lot like sexual ecstasy, but describing it as “a nun masturbating” is just… wrong.

There are more examples of untrue things being presented as fact in this post, but the point is just: Don’t expect the information on Tumblr to be even remotely true. Because it usually isn’t. It will tell an emotionally compelling story. But that’s not the same thing.

Reposted from http://lies.tumblr.com/post/43937260472.

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