Paris Hilton: Porn Director

I saw this the other day, but the significance of the claim didn't really register in my mind untill today. Rick Soloman has filed a lawsuit against "Marvad Corp", for displaying still shots taken from the well known video of he and Paris Hilton having sex on their web site. The basis of his suit is copyright infringement -- which is key to keep in mind, because Marvad's lawyers have responded by claiming that as "The Producer", he is commiting fraud by claiming copyright without the consent of Paris Hilton, "The Director".

From their petition: "Ms Hilton offered directorial comments and physically controlled and directed the camera. Solomon's failure to identify Ms Hilton as a co-author on the application for copyright registration renders the certificate of registration invalid and fraudulent."

Drezner Does Britney (In His Dreams)

From actually-able-to-be-stomached conservative blogger Daniel Drezner (see, Adam? they do exist) comes this fascinating item: A very informative post about... Britney Spears.

Streisand Tossed Out of Court

As metioned previously, Babs has been acting like a spoiled little child, complaining that the California Coastal Records Project had violated the sanctity of her home, and was aiding stalkers. I didn't notice untill today, but last week the judge dismissed her case.
The CCRP web site has more info about the dismissal, and tons of press links.

Oh Britney!

Wow, we'll sue over anything, won't we?

Britney Opens Her Mouth Some More

In an interview with CNN following up on her notorious open-mouthed kiss with Madonna at the MTV Video Music Awards, Britney Spears had some interesting commentary when asked about her position regarding the war in Iraq: "Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision that he makes and we should just support that."

That's my little Mouseketeer.

The Kiss(es)

For those of you who aren't members of the MTV generation, you may not have heard about "The Kiss" (or more appropriately: "The Kisses") from Thursday nights MTV Video Music Awards. Being the 20th anniversary, Britney Spears & Christina Aguilera got together on stage to do a tribute rendition of Madona's legendary "Like A Virgin" stage performace from the very first VMA ceremony. They were then joined by the orriginal material girl, who launched into her latest single "Hollywood", taking breaks between versuses to plant big juicy open mouthed kisses on each of the two pop-princesses.

For those of you who like looking at hot chicks kissing, there are plenty of pictures all over the web, and even some video clips.

There are plenty of people pointing out how contrived the whole thing was, but what I find most ammusing is how much all the coverage has been about "Madona kissing Britney" -- with very little mention of the fact that she planted big wet ones on both of them. The clip I saw acctually cut away when Madona turned towards Christina .... which brings me to the second most ammusing part of all this, the way they cut to Justin Timberlake just for a reaction shot. (I have to admit, it was a hilarious reaction shot).

Ted, you deserve better

Sports Illustrated has not one, but two stories about the current conditions of Ted Williams's cryogenically frozen remains. The New York TImes seems to have followed up the story, and has some more details.
What a wild, wacky, and sad sad state of affairs.

James Woods Interview in Salon

It's kind of hard to categorize this one. It's an interview with actor James Woods by Salon writer Amy Reiter, and it's definitely worth watching the MCI commercial (or whatever) to get the one-day pass for it: Woods on fire. He's promoting his new movie, Northfork, so it should probably go in the "Movies" category, but the interview actually ends up being about lots of other things, like whether or not George Bush is a moron and why people on the left-wing can't admit that it was a bad thing for Bill Clinton to put a cigar in Monica Lewinsky's vagina and whether it's important that WMD have not been found in Iraq and so on. On balance, I think the thing the interview is "about," more than anything else, is the nature of celebrity and the larger context of people like Woods doing interviews like this, so that's the category I chose for it.

I certainly don't agree with all the conclusions Woods comes to. But I certainly do agree with some of them. And his comments about the frustration of dealing with people whose minds are already made up on every political issue struck a chord with me, given the kind of ranting I've been doing on this site lately.

It's Official: Britney Did It with Justin

It was more than a year ago, in May of 2002, that Justin Timberlake rocked our world with the news that Britney was not, in fact, a virgin. Well, she has now confirmed it. From CNN: Britney acknowledges she's not a virgin.

Excuse me. I have to go lie down.

Melanie Griffith's Scary Face

From British tabloid The Sun, courtesy of Daypop: Face up to the facts, Mel. Not Michael Jackson yet, by a long shot, but yeah, scary.

Martha to be somebody's bitch?

She lied to the SEC. She lied to the FBI. And this isn't about her hiding her secret recipe for chicken tartar. The question remains on whether or not she is going to go to jail for misleading investigators over a paltry $229,000.00. But at least its going to be entertaining to watch her squirm in the courtroom!

Hey, maybe we can talk jbc into giving us a daily update on her wardrobe throughout the trial.

Streisand Sues California Coastal Records Project

Barbra Steisand is really annoying sometimes. At the moment, because she's suing the California Coastal Records Project. It seems she resents the fact that multimillionaire Kenneth Adelman included her Malibu estate in his exhaustive, and extemely cool, catalog of coastal images, intended as a tool for anti-development forces that need to be able to document illegal coastal development.

Anyway, read about it in this LA Times article: Streisand sues over photograph of her coast home on web site. And be sure to go to the page that displays her estate, so her obnoxious legal effort will be guaranteed to have the exact opposite effect of what the privacy-obsessed diva intended.

Update: More detail from californiacoastline.org on the history of their interaction with Babs.

Darth Vadar, People Person

On the lighter side of things, I felt this was too choice not to post on: Darth Vader Made Me Cry.

Rumsfeld's free-speaking verse

slate.msn.com has a few choice ditties by Donald Rumsfeld from the past few years. It's the kind of list you could compile for just about anybody if enough source material is available ... but it's a humorous read none the less.

Harry Belafonte Kicks Ass

Speaking to television reporters in Finland during a break in his Finnish tour, singer Harry Belafonte said the U.S. is currently being run by "men who are possessed of evil" (among some other choice quotes). I'm not sure why it makes me so happy to read that, but damn, it really does. You tell 'em, Harry.

Fred Rogers, R.I.P.

Someone who taught me, and a lot of other boys and girls, about the values of caring and openness and honesty passed away this morning. Fred Rogers, rest in peace.

Pre-Pee-wee Trial Jockeying Continues

Prosecutors are doing their best to paint Paul Reubens as a menace to society, based on the 50-year-old images in his vintage gay porn collection, as we continue through the process of pre-trial motions. Fucking Ashcrofts. Don't you think there might be some children actually being abused out there somewhere who could benefit from some of the time and energy you're currently devoting to railroading this guy?

Madonna Readies Anti-War Video

Apparently the new Madonna video for her song "American Dream" will feature a violently depicted anti-war message. You go, girl. (Always nice when I can run a story that is actually about the person whose image I stole for the category image.)

Winona Celebrity Pays Off

Winona Ryder apparently will appear in Marc Jacobs' spring advertising campaign, reprising her role as criminal clothes horse from last fall's trial. You go, girl.

Free Pee Wee

From the Village Voice's Richard Goldstein comes this excellent write up of the railroading currently being inflicted on one of my personal heroes: Paul Reubens, aka Pee Wee Herman. This pisses me off bigtime.

Rundle: Winona Was a Walking Pharmacy at the Time of Her Arrest

Deputy D.A. Ann Rundle has filed the prosecution's brief in advance of Friday's sentencing of Winona Ryder. Rundle calls for community service, a $26,000 fine, and drug counseling, which, except for that intervening trial and conviction part, is pretty much what I was predicting back in the day. The most interesting part of the brief is where Rundle details all the drugs Winona had on her at the time of the arrest. I don't think there can be any real question but that the girl, for all her clothes sense, has a serious substance-abuse problem.

Another Wacko Jacko Photo

Not content with frightening children with his face, Michael Jackson has apparently taken to dangling toddlers from fourth-floor balconies. Update: More details, for those so inclined. Later: Jackson, under heavy criticism, calls dangling the infant from the balcony a horrible mistake.

Press Piles on Jacko

The gloves (well, glove, and surgical mask, too) are off, apparently, as the world media goes nuts over Michael Jackson's face. As in this story from the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, titled But can Michael Jackson recall the details of his nose? I realize I did the very same thing here on lies.com the instant I saw that first day's photo, but I thought real-life news outlets would have a touch more decorum. Silly me. Update: Here's another story, from Reuters, with expert analysis from a panel of plastic surgeons. Eesh.

Michael Jackson Testifies

Appearing in a packed courtroom to testify about his failure to perform a 1999 concert, Michael Jackson must have elicited audible gasps from the gallery when he removed a surgical mask to reveal the latest incarnation of his face. And no, I will not be devoting a wiki page to subsequent appearances.

Winona Day X: Maroon and a Verdict

Winona's in dark maroon today, with some odd-looking shoes; see photos on the wiki's WinonaRyderOnTrial page. We've also got a verdict, reportedly, to be announced by late morning. Update: Guilty on the grand theft and vandalism charges; not guilty on burglary. Sentencing set for December 6.

Winona Day IX: Low-Key

We're back to the dark jacket look (or perhaps it's a dark dress that just looks like a jacket) at the Winona Ryder trial. See the wiki's WinonaRyderOnTrial page for the latest images and commentary. Today is jury-deliberation day, with the possibility of a verdict before the day is over. My prediction: a guilty verdict, followed by a sentence involving probation, fine, and counseling, but no jail time. But I think an actual stay behind bars is still a possibility, if the judge decides to try to set the little lady straight and scare her away from future acts of self-destruction. Update: No verdict today (Tuesday); jury to return tomorrow for more deliberations.

Winona Day VIII: White Again, Hooray!

Winona returns to an outfit reminiscent of the white-dress stunner of October 16. Photos and commentary in the wiki's WinonaRyderOnTrial page. Update: The defense rests, with no calling of Winona to testify on her own behalf. The prosecution has given its closing statement; the defense's closing statement is expected later today. Later: Some interesting bits about the closing statements are in this Associated Press article. Judge's instructions and jury deliberation tomorrow.

The Gray Lady Does Winona

Just when you thought it was safe, with the trial on hold for the weekend, here comes even more Winona coverage. Specifically, check out this nice article from the New York Times: For the Ryder Trial, a Hollywood Script. It gives a good summary of where things stand currently, along with some speculation about why someone like Winona would have shoplifted.

Winona Day VII: Same Look, Different Day

Today's look from Winona (see the bottom of the wiki's WinonaRyderOnTrial page) is nearly indistinguishable from yesterday's, at least based on the two photos that have come out so far. It's a different dark coat over the top, and looks like a dark sweater, rather than a dark jacket, in the middle layer, but the shirt could be the same one as yesterday's, and the purse is the same, too. Haven't seen the pants yet. I wonder if this reflects a growing recognition on Winona's part of the seriousness of what she's involved in here. When defending yourself against charges that you're clothes-crazy enough to go shoplifting stuff you could easily have just purchased, maybe the wearing of wackily different outfits each day of the trial hurts more than helps.

Winona Day VI: Dressing Down

Today's outfit: Jeans, a long black coat, a dark jacket underneath, a white blouse, and a tourquoise pendant. Photos (and later, once I get a chance, commentary) available in the wiki's WinonaRyderOnTrial page.

Winona Day V: Whoa

Today's outfit is a fairly intense black dress with jaunty pastel accents. My first reaction was "femme fatale," but Madison (who, like Lucy, has actually been paying attention to clothes significantly longer than the last few days during which I've been paying attention to them) responded, "Actually, I think that's the 'I'm a harmless little girl in a sailor dress' look." The shoes don't exactly say either "little girl" or "sailor" to me, but I think I see her point. Anyway, in the interest of keeping the Winona entries under some semblance of control, I'm going to try to confine my further raving to the wiki's WinonaRyderOnTrial page.

Winona Day IV: Green and Frumpy

Things took a turn for the worse in the second full day of the Winona Ryder trial, as the actress arrived in a really yucky-looking green thing (dress? coat? hard to tell, or care, honestly). Photo coverage is pretty sparse so far (for which I guess we should actually be grateful), though it does look like she's sporting yet another jarringly mismatched purse, if the strap and possibly-associated white and brown fringed thing visible in this photo mean what I think they do. Excuse me; I think I'm going to have to go lie down. Update: Speculation runs wild on the question of whether the first image above shows a worn collar edge (the hint of white along the right collar). And now, a newly released photo seems to show the same thing on the left collar. Lies.com fashion correspondent Lucy, in looking at the second photo, says, "I'm more inclined to think it's some decorative edging that's reflecting the flash, instead of a worn edge." I really hope she's right. If not, I have serious doubts about whether Winona's legal team will be able to recover. Later: We've got good news and bad news, people. The good news is that I was wrong about that white and brown fringed thing under Attorney Mark Geragos' arm; whatever it was, it wasn't Winona's purse. The bad news is that the purse she actually brought today is even worse than I imagined. Is there still time for a plea bargain? Still later: She looks better after the lunch break, with her coat unbuttoned to reveal a dark blouse underneath. And is that even the same purse? Last update, I promise: In my shock at today's outfit, I totally forgot to mention that it's Winona's birthday today. Happy 31st from lies.com! And in terms of the actual trial, about all that happened today, apparently, was that the Saks security supervisor narrated a video showing her walking around the store picking out clothes.

Day III: Winona in Black

Day III of the Winona Ryder trial opened with a bang, as the defendant arrived in a dramatic black dress (I think; these through-the-glass shots they're limiting the paparazzi to leave something to be desired). The see-through factor was unfortunate; she may have received inadequate legal advice on the effect of high-powered flash photography in combination with a white bra. She's still got a big, ugly purse, but it's a different big ugly purse, thankfully. The headband was a nice touch, I think. No word yet on the less-important details, like opening statements. Update: Opening statements are done; the prosecution makes it out as theft, plain and simple. The defense paints a more interesting picture, in which security guards overstep the bounds of their authority because they were (naturally) gaga at being in Winona's celebrity presence. Later: In late testimony Monday, Saks security manager Kenneth Evans said Winona claimed to have been preparing for a role when she was confronted about her shoplifting. The defense objected, saying the allegation hadn't surfaced in any previous statements by the prosecution, but they were overruled.

Winona, Day II

The jury for Winona Ryder's shoplifting trial was sworn in yesterday. Confirming the adage that you can't throw a rock in L.A. without hitting a film producer, the Beverly Hills jury will include Peter Guber, former chairman of Sony Entertainment Pictures. The 8-woman, 4-man jury also includes a woman who is a legal secretary with Sony Pictures and a man who works in TV program development. Winona wore a blue full-length jacket, red pumps, and carried the same god-awful purse she had on Day I. I wonder if the purse is meant to work in her favor with the jury: See? Winona always carries a big, ugly handbag. It doesn't mean she's planning to shoplift. If that's the angle the defense is working, I guess I have to accept it, but it will really be a shame if they feel they have to continue it for the entire trial. Accessories matter, dammit.

Winona Trial Begins Today

It's jury-selection day in the Winona Ryder trial, though I haven't been able to find out what she's wearing yet. With the F.B.I. reporting that they believe they have the D.C. sniper in custody, though, hopefully we'll be able to get more detail soon. (I did come across this story about Christina Aguilera piercing her private parts, at least. Thank God the media are getting back to covering real news.) Update: Looks like a fairly restrained floral-print dress with pink sweater. Later: From Lucy, a better photo. Check out the shoes. But that shoulder bag? I dunno; I realize she needs to appeal to jurors by dressing down a bit, but it seems like a little much to me.

Steve Bing Still a Wanker

See if you can follow. American real-estate heir and film producer Steve Bing initially made headlines by asserting that Elizabeth Hurley's baby wasn't his. (Subsequent DNA tests proved him wrong.) Among the negative publicity he received at the time was a story in the Daily Mirror that gave Bing's phone number and encouraged readers to call him. Bing sued the tabloid, the tabloid settled, and one of the terms of the settlement was that the paper had to run an apology. Bing's lawyers wrote the apology, the paper ran it verbatim, and Bing issued a statement saying he was "delighted." But now he's changed his mind, and says he may revive the suit. Why? Because he apparently has figured out that the overly effusive way the paper apologized (e.g., under a front-page headline stating, "A humble and sincere apology to Mr. Steve Bing, philanthropist & humanitarian") was actually intended as sarcasm.

Winona Ordered to Appear in Court Today

Judge Elden Fox has ordered Winona Ryder to appear in court today, after an unspecified "unusual circumstance" prevented the actress from showing up yesterday, thereby delaying her trial yet again. Among the things we can look forward to today are the official dismissal of the drug-possession charges, and the replacement of the stock photos from her last appearance with a new round of pics. What will she be wearing?? Update: A really stunning ivory dress/jacket combo, with matching handbag, it turns out. Drug charges dropped, trial to start Oct. 24.

Prosecutor Asks That Winona Drug Charges Be Dropped

from the all-winona,-all-the-time dept.

Winona Ryder got some good news yesterday, when prosecutors in her shoplifting-cum-painkiller-possession trial requested that drug-possession charges be dropped. Seems a witness supplied an affidavit that showed Winona actually had a prescription, or thought it was okay for her to possess the drugs, or something. So, does this mean the prosecutors were basically blowing smoke before? Methinks the whole "railroading" theory gets a boost from this. But I'm fairly biased, since I think she's cute. Of course, this is nothing like the bias I'd display if they ever tried to charge Janie Porche with something. Sigh. Janie...

Winona Plea Deal Dead; Trial Date Set

from the wrong-again,-dammit dept.

Despite breathless predictions to the contrary from certain tabloids that shall remain nameless, there will be no plea bargain in Winona Ryder's shoplifting case. The trial is set to commence October 7. Man, what a fall season we've got lined up: new albums from Peter Gabriel and U2, the extended-edition FOTR DVD and The Two Towers theatrical release, and the Winona trial.

Winona in Plea Negotiations?

from the court-ordered-rehab,-here-we-come dept.

So, supposedly Winona Ryder's lawyers are in meetings with prosecutors, leading to speculation that she may be in the process of working out a plea bargain for her drug-possession-cum-shoplifting thing. I suppose I should have expected that, but I confess to being a little disappointed that there won't be more celebrity hijinks to follow as the trial runs its course. Anyway, here's my bet: 6 months' probation and a mandatory visit to a drug-treatment center, in return for pleading guilty to various misdemeanors. Remember: you read it here first.

The History of Michael Jackson's Face

from the not-really-suitable-for-children dept.

A nice visual wrap-up of the changes in The King of Pop's face over the years, with accompanying commentary. Nothing new, really, but still, like, whoa.

Britney to Take a Break from Music

from the aw.-and-she-made-such-GOOD-music,-too. dept.

Heeding the old showbiz maxim that you should always leave the audience wanting more, Britney apparently is going to take some time off from her music career. "She has been touring non-stop and she understandably needs to take a break," said a spokesperson for Britney's Jive Records label. "She's looking forward to having more time for other activities: making movies, smoking, having sex, and giving people the finger. But she'll be back."

More Detail on the Anna Nicole Show

from the putting-the-'ew'-back-into-ew.com dept.

From the celebrity-obsessed folks at Entertainment Weekly comes an article that goes into some more depth, and dishes some new dirt, about the upcoming Anna Nicole Show.

Blood Curse

from the terms-of-psychic-warfare dept.

Angelina Jolie reportedly wants the vial of blood she gave former husband Billy Bob Thorton back, seems she's afraid of a curse being put on her. Underneath the thing about K-19.

Pam Anderson Plans Hepatitis Treatment

from the another-thing-tommy-lee-gave-her dept.

Pammy's sick! She claims rocker Tommy Lee gave her hepatits C when they shared a tattoo needle.

But What About the Vial of Blood?

from the i.told.you.so dept.

Maybe it was that bad country album, or maybe it was the strain of being married to someone named Billy Bob, who knows?

Britney Starves Self, Blacks Out

from the wow.-just-like-Gandhi. dept.

Desperate to shed the pounds she's packed on since breaking up with Justin, Britney Spears has apparently been on a veggies-and-water diet recently, causing her to collapse after a recent concert. Eat something, Britney! I don't want your death on my conscience!

Michael Jackson Really Hates Porn

from the I-refuse-to-call-him-the-king-of-pop dept.

In our continuing effort to pin down the priorities of Michael Jackson, we have learned he hates porn more than he cares for 9-11 victims. Michael -- he's always looking out for the children.

The Anna Nicole Show

from the plus-size-entertainment dept.

Uber-widow Anna Nicole Smith is coming to the small screen in August, when E! will begin airing an Osbournes-esque reality show that follows the misadventures of Ms. Smith, her poodle, and various hangers-on.

Bing Drops 'Invasion of Privacy' Suit Against Kerkorian

from the what-a-putz dept.

You may recall Steve Bing, the Hollywood producer who went to court to show he wasn't the biological father of Elizabeth Hurley's baby. (Turns out he actually was the baby's dad, unfortunately for said baby.) Well, his name crossed my radar again, this time in connection with his dropping of a lawsuit he'd brought against MGM studio mogul Kirk Kerkorian, who Bing accused of invading his privacy by digging through his trash to find a sample of dental floss, with the accompanying biological material to have been used to establish that Bing, not Kerkorian, was the biological father of the 4-year-old daughter of Kerkorian's ex-wife. Do I detect a pattern here? Sheesh; what a wanker.

Winona Pleads 'Not Guilty'

from the the-wheels-of-justice-grind-on dept.

So, Winona Ryder had her delayed-due-to-elbow-breakage hearing, and pled (pleaded? pleadified?) not guilty to shoplifting charges. Stay tuned for more.

Space Station Commander Invites Cindy Crawford to Visit

from the lonely-cosmonauts dept.

Valery Korzun, the newly arrived Russian commander of the International Space Station, told reporters yesterday that he has no problem with NSync's Lance Bass visiting the station, but if he had his druthers, he'd rather host Cindy Crawford (or "one of the supermodels," at least). Dream on, Valery.

Winona Back in Court

from the when-celebrities-go-bad,-part-II dept.

Winona Ryder's preliminary hearing resumed yesterday, with five witnesses testifying as to her behavior during her alleged shoplifting spree. The defense was pretty low-key, limiting itself to some sarcastic questions of store security guards ("And do you get a lot of homeless people wearing three-quarter-length cashmere coats?"), and then alleging almost (but not quite?) perjury in comments to reporters on the courthouse steps. Anyway, the judge ruled there was sufficient evidence for a trial, so the fun will continue.

Woody Harrelson Arrested After London Taxi Chase

from the when-celebrities-go-bad,-part-I dept.

Yay! Another celebrity has had a run-in with the law under weird circumstances. Specifically, actor Woody Harrelson (Cheers, Natural Born Killers, White Men Can't Jump) apparently got into a disagreement with a London cabbie involving a broken ashtray and a damaged door, then jumped out of the cab and into another, leading to a high-speed chase and his eventual apprehension by police. He's now out on bail, with a hearing scheduled for July 1.

Britney Will Call Your Cellphone for $19.99

from the a-day-without-Britney-is-a-day-without...-Britney dept.

I really don't know why Britney Spears has seeped so far into the lies.com consciousness, but there it is: I can't help posting anything I see about Britney. Like this: an obsessed-fan package from your wireless provider that costs $19.99 and comes with a membership card, a decal, and three months' worth of personal cellphone messages from the Goddess Herself describing everything she's up to. I so want this, though I'm pretty sure I'd find it really, really stupid after the first couple of minutes. So I'll just go on wanting it, which sounds way better to me, all things considered.

Winona Injures Arm. Or Maybe Not.

from the same-story,-different-celebrity dept.

Actress Winona Ryder, who appeared at a preliminary hearing yesterday in connection with charges she had shoplifted and possessed painkillers without a prescription, requested, and was granted, a delay after she said that her arm had been injured while she was pushing her way through the throng of reporters surrounding the courtroom. Interestingly, her lawyer said her right elbow had been broken, but it was actually the left arm that she appeared to be cradling when she entered the courtroom. Oops. Anyway, the hearing is scheduled to resume Thursday. (Disclosure: I think Winona Ryder is way cool, even if - no, especially if - the charges against her are true. So shoot me.)

Madonna Pregnant. Or Maybe Not.

from the immaculate-conception dept.

Is Madonna pregnant with her third child? Rumors started flying when she was seen having her 17-month-old son Rocco pat her tummy during a shopping excursion. Then her dad, Tony Ciccone, told a reporter that she was expecting. "We were delighted when we heard but I can't speak about it." Oh, hey, nice compliance on that request, dad. Anyway, now Madonna's publicist has issued a blanket denial: "It's completely untrue." Sure it is.

Lance Bass Cleared for Space

from the extraterrestrial-tourism dept.

N'Sync member Lance Bass has been cleared to go into space, moving him one step closer to blasting off on a Russian rocket for a trip to the international space station. When I was a kid watching the Apollo moon landings, imagining the glorious sci-fi future I'd be living in in the 21st century, I never thought of this particular scenario. But here it is: welcome to the future. Who will be the next celebrity in space? Michael Jackson? Britney??!!

Crowd Boos Claudia Schiffer at Wedding

from the show-us-your-dress dept.

A crowd of photographers and obsessive fans assembled outside the church where Claudia Schiffer was about to be married booed the big-lipped supermodel when she entered the church concealed by blanket-carrying security guards. Schiffer was marrying British film producer Matthew Vaughn, who reportedly won the 31-year-old's heart by giving her a tortoise.

Kato Kaelin's 'Houseguest' Show in Development

from the be-afraid.-be-very-afraid. dept.

Famous O.J. Simpson houseguest Kato Kaelin is reportedly working on his own TV show called Houseguest. "It's a show where I go across America, I knock on doors of the unsuspecting and invite myself in to spend a weekend with the family," says Kaelin. Right. Then a former-athelete friend of his shows up in a ski mask and cuts everyone's throat.

Britney Caught Smoking?

from the all-Britney,-all-the-time dept.

The New York Post is running a photo that they claim shows Britney Spears smoking a cigarette on the balcony of her hotel in Australia. (See, along with saying she wouldn't have sex before marriage, she's also been quoted as saying she wouldn't smoke.) I dunno; it's not a very clear picture. But I think I've found my new poll question.

Britney Not a Virgin!?!?

from the finally,-some-REAL-news dept.

Justin Timberlake has reportedly said that Britney Spears, the famous "no sex before marriage" sex goddess, is in fact not a virgin. I don't know about you, but personally, this just blows my whole image of her. Say it ain't so, Joe.

Steve Bing Questions Hurley Baby's Paternity

from the how-does-it-feel-to-be...-one-of-the-beautiful...-people dept.

Old news to you celebrity watchers, of course, but I guess it's time to acknowledge the ongoing sniping taking place over the paternity of actress Elizabeth Hurley's new baby. The Independent has the latest info, describing how movie producer Steve Bing is going to court in an effort to establish the paternity of the baby, Damian, born last month. This seems odd, since, at least according to the Hurley camp, she's never objected to having the baby's paternity established. My own prediction: yeah, Bing's probably the father - unfortunately for the child, who gets to look forward to having a real wanker for a dad.

Anna Nicole Smith Wants $30 Million More

from the $88-million-doesn't-go-as-far-as-it-used-to dept.

Former Playboy playmate Anna Nicole Smith, who recently won an $88 million judgement against the estate of her fabulously wealthy late husband, is back in court asking for an additional $30 million. Explained Smith, "People don't understand all the expenses I have. I mean, $88 million sounds like a lot of money, but when you actually start adding everything up, it goes pretty fast."

Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson Engaged

from the she-always-picks-such-nice,-wholesome-young-men dept.

Just in time to take our minds off the ongoing Middle East bloodbath, the L.A. Times is one of several outlets carrying the AP story on Kid Rock's marriage proposal to Pamela Anderson last night, and her acceptance of same. Wishing them every joy.

Stephen Fry: Miserable and Loving It

from the Jeeves-was-never-this-conflicted dept.

Actor Stephen Fry, the quintessential Jeeves from the British TV series based on P.G. Wodehouse's Jeeves and Wooster stories, has this fairly interesting interview currently running in the New Zealand Herald. The thing that makes it interesting to me, besides the fact that I love everything he's done, is the way he comes across as so dreadfully exhausted with the whole endless treadmill of movie publicity (Gosford Park is opening in New Zealand on Thursday, apparently), that he's just saying whatever nutty thing comes to mind, in the process painting a pretty compelling picture of a guy who really needs a vacation. This part, for example: "Fry appears perplexed when asked if he would ever entertain suicidal thoughts again. 'How can I know?' he asks in a tone of incredulity. 'I haven't the faintest idea.'"

The Britney-Google Connection

from the ah,-more-about-Britney dept.

From the fine folks at BBspot comes a link to this gem: a Google page documenting the incidence of misspellings of "Britney Spears" in the search requests they see. So, there are apparently nearly 600 different ways to spell her name, all of which have been entered by at least a couple (and sometimes many more) users over the past few months, all of which Google will successfully interpret as being a search for her. Wow. That's just... um, something.

Naomi Campbell Lies Under Oath, Wins Case Anyway

from the beutiful-people-can-get-away-with-anything dept.

The Independent News is one of many outlets carrying the story of supermodel Naomi Campbell's legal victory over The Mirror, which she sued for invasion of privacy after the tabloid published a series of articles describing her treatment for cocaine addiction. Interestingly, the British high court sided with Campbell even though, as one judge put it, he was "satisfied that she lied on oath" about the reason for her admission to a hospital. So you see, even liars can win sometimes - as long as they're pretty enough.